Funny sayings about dating

Looking for funny sayings about dating or funny things to say during the date? Read through the list of sayings about dating below.

A woman to a man during a slow dance: Is there a gun in your pocket or you’re just happy that we met?

A good kiss is worth another one.

I am ashamed for last night. Just don’t remember before whom…

I don’t speak with strangers in bed.

There was nothing between us…even a condom.

If you don’t have a girlfriend, it means someone has two of them.

I’m ashamed for yesterday, but don’t remember for what…

Our friendship suddenly turned into me being pregnant.

‘Do you sell pregnancy tests?’ ‘What kind do you need? Positive or negative?’

Miss, it won’t work between us. The way you want it to be – I can’t do any longer and the way I want – you wouldn’t like.

Remember, if a girl gave you a key to her heart; don’t be so lucky, tomorrow she will change the locks.


Learn from your parents mistakes – use a condom!

If during a date a girl starts looking down – it means she likes him. If a guy does the same – it means he likes her legs.

If you asked a girl for a dance and she said yes: don’t look so happy – first you will still have to dance.

A dance is a vertical representation of the horizontal desire.

If you keep persuading a woman for too long, she will think that talking is the only thing you are good at.

Why the buttons on men’s clothes are on the right and women’s on the left? Elementary my dear Watson, it’s easier to button up with the right hand.

Madonna with child – a painting of an unknown artist.

Come in, take your clothes off, lie down, hello!

While looking at her face it seemed like her legs were crooked.

The road to a man’s heart is standing up.

Analgin – a very reliable medicine against pregnancy. How to use – squeeze between your legs and don’t let go.

It was too late to pretend to be an impotent.

…when a mermaid will make a split…

A magic wand – is a night spent with a magician.

Miss, where did you buy these thin and curved pantyhose?

I came, I sow and I ran away…

“I lost the most fantastic lover I ever had. I married him.”

A praise for you girlfriend: Your chromosomes have combined beautifully.

When your ex says “you’ll never find anyone like me” reply with “that’s the point”.

Game over. Thank you for playing.

When he offered her to be his girlfriend, she felt from a chair and was running around the room from happiness. And she replied: I will think about that.

Sometimes the best way to attract someone’s attention is to pay no attention to someone.

Dear prince on a white horse, if you won’t show up soon, I will start dating with that stupid goat with the new Mercedes.

If you can’t find a girlfriend, that probably means that someone found two of them…

I’m fine… just a little broken.


Other funny sayings, similar to dating sayings you may find in categories:

Funny friendship sayings

Funny relationship sayings

Funny sayings about marriage

For similar sayings please browse funny sayings about men (or Men’s relationship with women) also funny sayings about women (and its subpage Women’s relationship with men).

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