Funny Mother’s Day quotes

If you are looking for funny Mother’s Day quotes, you came to the right place as we have gathered for you dozens of funny sayings. Be cautions, some of them are pretty black humor and you should reconsider using them to congratulate your mother 🙂 Some of them are simply funny quotes you may share with your friends, but your mom could be insulted. So, happy reading and happy Mother’s Day!

I love you lightly more than I love my dad. Happy Mother’s Day!

I wish a Happy Mother’s Day to all of my hookers.

Repaying for all the love you gave me, one day I’ll pay your nursing home bills.

Please accept my thanks for helping me solve the childhood problems you caused me.

It was a pleasure to learn from your mistakes with men.

I want to thank my Mom for never giving in to her urge to handcuff me to herself.

Mom, I am happy for you because your maternity clothes were much more convenient than Kim Kardashian’s are.

Dear Mom, you’re my second least embarrassing parent on Facebook. Happy Mother’s Day!

Knowing your surprising sexual promiscuity, I still can’t congratulate you on Mother’s day.

I am really happy we become much closer since you started writing me instead of calling.

My dad was really lucky to have you before the marriage fall apart.

You’ll be a great mom by the second child. Happy Mother’s Day!

I wish you happy unintentional Mother’s Day.

I am grateful for reducing your alcohol consumption while I was living inside your belly.

I am happy son that you was not so famous enough to adopt a baby instead of having me.

I wish this Mother’s Day lunch will help deny 364 days of my ungratefulness.


Funny Mother’s Day gift ideas

Are you looking for some great ideas what to present for your mom? Than coming to Funny Mother’s Day gif ideas website might not be the best place, unless you want to make a funny saying surprise for your mother. So here’s the list of some gift ideas:

  • Gift coupon valid for number of drinks which helps to forget about disappointments in me.
  • Gift coupon valid for reading one forwarded email from you.
  • Gift coupon valid for one artificially enthusiastic reaction to news about the engagement of a kid I went to secondary school with.
  • Gift coupon valid for one mom home visit without bringing my dirty laundry for you to do.
  • Gift coupon with one week of me saying only beautiful things to mom.
  • Gift coupon valid for one phone call informing that my plane landed safely despite that this information easy accessible.
  • Gift coupon valid for one dinner where I’ll quietly listen to your advices about relationship with women.
  • Gift coupon valid for one time help to put songs on your iPod.
  • Gift coupon good for one conversation of telling you exactly what you want to hear.
  • Gift coupon redeemable for one Facebook like on your status about the weather.
  • Gift coupon redeemable for one “dad’s new girlfriend looks fat.”
  • Gift coupon good for one dinner I insist on paying for even though we both know you’ll eventually pick up the check.
  • Gift coupon good for one half hour of me pretending to be scared of the obscure disease you just read all about.



If you have heard of some other great funny Mother’s Day quotes, please share them with the world through our website. You can share your funny saying as a comment on this page below. We will definitely include all the top quotes in our website.

You may also find some more funny Mother’s Day quotes on pages Mother’s Day quotes and Mother’s Day sayings.